Kuriosities

Pride – my peacock and the quince bush

So here is my awful and overwhelming secret (there may be more, but this is the one that I will actually share with you). My studio is a den of filth and disarray. I am a muddle-brained person when it comes to organisation. It is not that I do not appreciate the beauty of a well organised and tidy space – I do! I long for it. I am just rotten at it. I am so distractable and yet in complete contrast, utterly and completely focused. If I am doing something such as reading something intriguing, or am lost in the making of a piece, I will actually not be able to hear you. I cannot see you enter the room. Nothing will exist outside of that object that has my passionate interest at the time. To get my attention you would likely actually have to touch my arm or give me a little jostle, at which point I will either be somewhat lost or you will have provoked my ire. A strength and a weakness both, that mad professor mind. Yet…I cannot put the scissors away in the same place twice. Even on my kindergarten report card (and every single one since) it says such things as K displays extraordinary focus, but seems to be lacking the necessary organization skills. or more specifically “K has a great deal of trouble keeping her desk organized which results in time wasted looking for things.” Hmmm…. well, it is still true, as you shall see. It has gotten to the point of chaos that is so huge and awful that I must now spend the day fixing it – which is obviously my least preferred way to spend my time – let alone a Sunday! This makes me a bit grouchy and snappish. <yes, I am frowning deeply now.>

Ok, deep breath, here goes, my shameful, shameful studio. (It is so shameful that an interviewee once told me that I needed to hire her specifically because I needed her skills at organization to clean my office – NOT part of the job description! -and I needn’t have to tell you that this statement was met with a grave and ashen response from me as she was quickly ushered out the door. The state of my studio is one of those things that it is understood should not be mentioned. ever. and I will actually at times defend its horrid state as a reflection of the creative mind and a sacred balance that must not be disturbed, lest the well dry up and the world collapse in ruin…)

And now for a complete contrast, to increase my shame, and thus my motivation – here is the desk of my assistant. Hrumph.

So am I writing today to avoid my studio’s state of mind-boggling disarray? Why, yes I am… silly questions! But when I am done, I shall bring myself to sort and sweep, however much I do not want to.

I do not like this particular sea, Lou
the way its waters part and
lead me to the bottom. And you
here waiting, with tea, and oranges
a chair pulled out from the table
for me to sit awhile at your side – all
unexpected.

There are no words, Lou
they have swam away like fishes. The
silvered minnow swish flickers
in the water, and away, as we
watch. I shift in my seat, then shift again

This was not the meeting
I had planned. This pebble in
the bottom of my tea cup, is
not mine to swallow. take it back.